Rotten Bastards

It's a blog. It's a way of life. It's many things in between.

Wednesday, 27 August 2008

my conception: an unerotic love story

it was a late night. my father was intoxicated with the fine taste of a 40 oz beer. he was poor as his first child, a daughter, wasn't planned and he was either too kind or stupid to kick his wife down the stairs. as he stumbled into bed, his wife had on a tattered negligee. their daughter was sleeping or passed out from the nyquil that she was given to her so she would shut the fuck up.

as he crawled into bed, he looked over at the thing in his bed. something was uttered to him by the thing that may have been sexual but thankfully he was too drunk to understand. darkness soon came over him thanks to the 8% beer.

he woke up later and felt his ribs getting crushed... what's happening?! he woke up to see thing on top of him, raping him. he was paralyzed (or too lazy) to push it off of him. being a lazy fuck, he was also too lazy to pull out. "whoops," he thought, "it's her problem anyways". drunk logic isn't good.

a few months later he can't understand why this bitch is puking every morning and getting fat. he thinks that she's eating too much. when 7-8 months comes around and it's too late to vacuum the fucker out, he realizes that she's pregnant.

maybe this is why my dad and i have so much animousity towards one another...


Tomby Stone said...

Let this be a warning, don't drink and screw. Lest you create a John.

King MAB said...

That may not be erotic, but damn if it wasn't romantic.

Sariel Thrawn said...

I thought the animosity came from when you hit pubery and you became the one who started to rape him when he got drunk?