Selflove.

• There's a girl in my bed.. Under my covers, twisted in my sheets. Her singlet has been pulled up, exposing her left breast. I tug on the nipple, hard enough to make her gasp. Her face is pressed against the pillow and she's starting to sweat. I slide my other hand into her lacy knickers, the ones she wore because she knows they turn me on. I'm rubbing the familiar damp spot between her legs, just the way she likes it.
  Her breathing gets heavier and she whispers my name. She bites her lip hard as she comes, then rolls over, her body shaking. "You're the best." She mumbles, already starting to drift off. There's a girl in my bed and I'm obsessed with her. I can't get enough.
  
  There's a girl in my bed...
  And she's me.

Splurfing

Splurfing is the sexual fetish of ejaculating into someone's nostril. In order to do this, they must have a large nose or the person must have a small penis. The penis must enter the nose and ejaculate so the semen goes far back into the nose canal. From here, the recipient of the semen must cause their self to sneeze the semen and snot back into the ejaculator's mouth. The ejaculator spits this substance into the other person's asshole and then fucks them in the ass with a strap on.

Said the bullet to the penis...

Fetish: A sexual fixation on a concept, object, or body part. A person with a fetish feels a compulsive need to use the object in order to obtain sexual gratification, and cannot achieve pleasure without it. ...

Sexual fetish? How about just having sex in the first place? That would be nice wouldn't it? Regular old penises entering regular old vaginas? Streaming ropes of jizzum hitting chins?

But I guess if one were hard pressed to find a 'fetish' one would have to definitely need to examine one's own personality first and determine what would float one's boat, so to speak.

Bearing that in mind, my new perversion would have to be... bullet wounds.

Take one fresh bullet wound. The location is a matter of personal taste. I prefer the chest and back areas myself. Once said bullet wound has been located, proceed to insert erect penis into the cavity. Thrust and repeat.

The beauty is that the blood acts as a lubricant and the wound itself is lovely and warm. Sure if the body you're fucking is still alive and conscious then there is bound to be some writhing and screaming, but that's supposed to happen anyways, right?

Studyish?

Suddenly the words on the page made me wet. It was feeding me information on modernity, the more I read the stronger the urge to have a self pampering became. Was it modernity that was making me feel this way? I needed to get these readings done,there was no time for play. I switched to cubism, hoping it would settle the ache. It became worse with every sentence...Am I getting turned on by study?